Mattel Classic Football

Did everyone else's dad have this handheld game, or was it just me?

Sometimes, it’s the simple things that mean the most to us. The same can be said for video games. Some of the best, most addicting games can be such a basic concept, like Flappy Bird or Candy Crush. One of my better gaming memories is retro. It is the Mattel Classic Football handheld electronic game.

The game is quite simple. You are on offense and there are three controls. You can either move up or down and move forward. That’s it. You move all the while the defenders are creeping towards you. You must weave your way in and out of the defense until you either get a touchdown or fail to after four downs. There was a time limit, and as you progress, the defense starts to move faster and it is tougher to move the ball.

Mattel Football 1

This game is so simple, and not difficult to pick up. In fact, I played it as a young child. I swear that everyone’s dad must have had this game, it is just such a dad thing to have. As you would play, the game made a “beep” sound every time the defense moved toward you. The stress would build in your thumbs with each beep, and you would focus so hard on dodging every defender coming your way.

I could spend ages on this handheld game. It killed so much time and was a fun experience for everyone. The whole room would take turns trying to beat everyone’s score, and it was an experience that we don’t get to have any more sadly.

I feel like this handheld was all the rage back in the day. When it first came out, it was probably one of the coolest things on the market. “Yo, check this out man, I can play football anywhere I want.” It is so funny that what seems like such a simple piece of technology to us was brand new and mind-blowing back in the day.

I wish they would come out with remakes of these classic handheld games. In addition to football, they had baseball and other sports as well. They are a great way to kill some time and you don’t have to invest a whole lot of brain power or strategy. You simply run the ball down the field and try to rack up the touchdowns. Keeping it simple and stupid isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes, it’s just what we need.

Grant Pfost, your gamer bro, enjoys long binges on the couch when he's not binge drinking like he's still in college. A connoisseur of tv and film, Grant hopes his articles will make you laugh, cry, and appreciate the little things in life.

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